hope everyones ok. im ok but mostly feeling unfourtunately busy and overwhelmed. i left work early because of the storm. also i came out with a zine! woohoo. it's part of a compilation themed around video games and beautifully risograph printed. i cant wait to get my grubby little hands on them :-)

im working on making my first level in my "game" and have been learning more coding @_@ not my strong suit, but i did make a cutscene and fix a weird problem i was having lol. unity is fun but hard! tata for now. m

time: 2:04am
mood: n/a
eating: wine
watching: george of the jungle (with brendon fraiser)

i cant believe ive lost in jump force the past two days with my bf. not that im any good to begin with but i usually win a match or two, but the past two days ive been out of my luck ;_; at first we only played when it was on game pass, then when it went off game pass we waited a few weeks for it to go on sale.. so i got the full package w/ all the dlc's for $24 hehe >:-) and my fav new character rn is law...ahhhh i don't even watch one piece but he's my fav rn i looove him.. eeep

ive been feeling so crazy busy that when i do finally have time to myself i fuck off LOL but i have commissions to finish and freelance work i need to catch up on >_< aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......... instead im daydreaming about making comics and games and thinking about the universe of the one comic im working on now.. space disaster.. i often write as i go but find it hard sometimes :-P i made a new character in the re-boot (pucci) and i loved her design so much i wanted to incorporate her more in the story lmaoo so ive been thinking about her back-story. her character and design is influenced various factors - i loved narancia's hair from jojo, and the name pucci, and j-fashion in general (like fruits mag), in particular i love early 00's fashion & gyaru - and playing law from jump force too lmaooo so i wanted to design a winter outfit for her, among other outfits.. i haven't decided on the main story for space disaster yet, but if i ever involved combat (i am an ex martial artist afterall.. i have tooo) i think she would do some cool bio-engineering based moves.. what that looks like idk, but i wanted her to be smarter than me and work in tech/science somehow, so i think bio-engineering fits her :-) space disaster is a loose sci-fi inspired by my love for the genre in its many forms~ like cowboy bebop, mystery science theater, pug davis, and sooo on! but i like the idea of sprouts/plants playing a big part - this comic is an excersize in imagining a future in which the environment takes precedence :-P so its fun to think about.. plants being the source of life, inputing a jpeg into a cell's memorie, ya knoow. that junk. idk when i'll have time to work on my comic again though ;_;


time: 8:33pm
mood: n/a
eating: coffee
watching: jojolion motion comics

i'm totally procastinating today.... latest chapter of jojolion came out and i wanted to do a lil animation >:-) i quickly modeled yasuho (dreading those roses) and her hair was soo fun to do!! it's rigged too and works better than i expected *chefs kiss* i think i might do nijimura next just cause im excited she's back! or paisley park because i love paisley park >:-(.

i was using this pose for reference:

OK back to work ;_;


time: 8:32pm
mood: n/a
eating: n/a
watching: n/a

posting a quick update to vent: lol i fucked up at work yesterday badly and had to cry in the bathroom and then cried the rest of the night because i was sooo freakin' stressed out. today was just damage control and was not as bad but still just a BLEH day >:-( im looking forward to my long thanksgiving break ;_;

edit: well, what happened was that between me and my co-worker we delivered the wrong (2) photographs to our (2) clients (while in a rush to do a lot of fucking work) and ofc. everyone was pissed off at me and i was juggling phone calls with the messenger serivce, driver, client, client's assistant, concierege, and my boss lol all who were very mad at me for the mix up. i was just very stressed and very freaked out trying to make it right.....and of course today we received the one photograph back meant for client #2 and it was damaged SO we have to fix it so of course i had to call client #2 and he was very very upset with meeeeee...........

did i mention i make minimum wage working for the uber rich? the irony is not lost on me. i want to quit so badly but i cant. i am so stressed out all the time and running on 2 brain cells because i dont sleep

every morning is an absolute struggle to get out of my warm bed, out of my partner's arms, heavy like a weighted blanket, and then go to work in godforsaken gentrified soho where i have to hear my boss worry about the virus and wanting thermometers, air filters, and not coming in to work all while refusing the close the business lol. so the rest of us can be sick, yeah? i hate to vent so much here but this is my one space to do it.


time: 10:34pm
mood: n/a
eating: n/a
watching: n/a

ty for the 200 followers on neocities! wahooo. a few days ago i finished my zine and sent the files off to the printer sooo expect it to be available end of this month. yaaay!

this is probably my most complex model yet! today i did the painstaking process of rigging her hair with physics (eugh..) and working on her animation. next is is fine tuning the details (like the hand animation) & properly weight painting the hair

(the gif is a bit sped up lol)

that's it for now!


mood: doom
eating: tequila
watching: vaush livestreaming

i dont have too much to say except 1. racist trolls can fuck off (lol dumb as fuck) and 2. ive been making more things in blender, see belooooow.

time: 11-12:30pm
mood: twee
eating: gummies
watching: vaush reviewing the debate

i got home and dedicated an hour on some freelance work and am all done with everything ive been sitting on, and im feeling good. i think i'm okay to say this as no one will see this but ive been invited to participate in this cool zine project (!!!) and also virtual gallery project to be released next month-ish. im supposed to make a zine on the topic of video games..heck yea!! it doesn't have to be serious either which is fun. i spent a night just picking out color combos (i went a lil overboard teehee) and sort of finally arrived at a decision. did i mention it's all risograph? i really loove the look of risographs and it's my first time ever getting to work with the medium...

i've been gathering pics of some of my fav games and have come across some crazy cool gems like sengoku turb.. so freakin cool! games aren't visually fun like this anymore.

i've also been thinking about 3d model design and am nostalgic for the look of these low-poly characters, which seemed so simple but effective and graphic. i think about those elements when making my own 3d models and sort of have been moving away from using the subdivsion modifer all the time.

i've been making more complex models lately because its fun but i wanna play around with making more low-poly stuff.

i made these for a unity project ive sort of put on hold until i git gud at c# (wah).

okay... now goodnight


time: 8:02-9:01pm
mood: tired
eating: asahi
watching: letterkenny clips

work is killing meeeeee !!!!!!!!!!!

first, some good news: as you may know, i recently joined curina's roster of artists, and my work is included in this neat virtual group show, Unruly Bodies, Unruly Hair... check it out !! well other than that, i feel so overworked i don't really have much to say or much to share...:-( cept that im trying to squeeze in time to draw when i can, and slowly am working on my comics... oh, and i am excited for chapter 101 of jojolion to be release after this two month hiatus *_* not that i can really complain, since i got caught up with it maybe like two weeks ago, LOL. i also am thinking about re-reading part 7 because i really love it so much ;_; i even drew this last week...

brrrrr hope to have some fun stuff to share later..... tata for now.

time: 10:03pm
mood: buzz buzz buzz
eating: n/a
listening: n/a

i had a brief figure collecting hobby in like 2014 and then stopped because i was a broke college student... =w= which is to say i just pre-ordered this gyro zeppeli figure... nyohoo~ ⊂( ◜⌔◝ )⊃

what's up? i feel so crazy busy. so busy in fact, that i cant get anything done...... because i have 0% mental capacity left. i've been into delta8 gummies recently and such a life saver for me lolol. i'm basically just staring at a stack of books i have to scan and archive for my second job but....it daunts me..... why work so much.......


time: 2:01am
mood: content
eating: n/a
listening: milkcan - make it sweet!

eeeeeeeeeeek! i missed drawing comics so much. during my college years i thought i should stick with fine art and painting, because it could be something i would be good at.. but my actual true love, is animation and comics... >w<

i think i spent the past two weeks working on this very rough draft of the first chapter of SPACE DISASTER? (the re-telling..) and i just finished.. it is based on THIS short comic i did in 2013.. and space disaster has come and gone in many ways but i finally wanted to sit down and commit to writing an actual long form comic like i always wanted >_< i think the inspiration behind space disaster spawned from rebbecca sugar's pug davis, but also my love for sci fi stories like cowboy bepop, mst3k and many others ^_^...

i'm hoping that i could eventually turn this into a printed comic.. that would make me so happy!

also, i've been off this week from work so i'm enjoying my week off FUCKING OFF and doing nothing ^_^ but play skyrim and draw and read manga (i just started jojo part 7 !!!). i'll keep this diary entry short, so tata for now.!!

time: 12:47am
mood: ;_;
eating: wine
watching: jojo part 5

long time no update! today has been a rollercoaster of emotion. basically i woke up to an email that dampened my morning.. also work was very annoying today u_u but anyways!!!!!! about two weeks ago a curator reached out to me and long story short my paintings are now available to buy/rent through this online platform called curina! it's local to nyc aaaand i'm soooo excited ^_^ please check out curina.co <3 <3 <3 !!!!

i've done a slight update to my artist website AND to my side project entrance or exit -- i'm still trying to nail down the branding for it =/ ngl, i wish i had a partner for this project because its so much work.. lol to learning html and 3d modeling to video game programming ;_; AND then there's graphic design marketing social media etc etc which i just feel im not ready for yet. i'm just taking my time though. ^^; i want the website to "feel" like a different world, which i'm sort of struggling with how to do so. I spent a day researching y2k web design (but not really that thoroughly), but also based on concepts from memory - i was thinking about skype and msn and windows 7 and 3d-esque buttons, etc, basically opposite to the minamilist flat-design you'll see today. i have a folder of visual references from this time which i might upload someday :~)

besides that i've been missing drawing a lot......i used to draw lots of comics and i'm trying to get back into it. space disaster is a comic i've been working on for eeeeverrr - maybe since 2012. it holds a special place in my heart as one of the first comic series i've done. :-P anyways you can catch my work in progress here. i'll post every now and then. i still have a few pages drafted that need to be drawn digitally - i've been thinking about the kind of stories i'd want to tell afterwards, too. . . .. ... to be continued :^)

time: 11:09pm
mood: eeeks! ^^
eating: sapporro
listening: urusei yatsura

n_n im so happeee urusei yatsura has been really active on facebook and uploading all this music i couldnt even get my hands on for so long... as much as i love browsing discogs, having music available on bandcamp is a lot easier and cheaper than shipping cd's from the uk.... i even got a reply on my comment on one of their recent posts ^o^ it feels like a small but dedicated fanbase on fb ~

i've been working more on this model (gifs below). i found this tutorial on YT on hair physics which was kind of complicated and tedious to actually do ;_; but i think the hard work paid off and while it isn't perfect it looks pretty okay...specially for my first attempt at this kind of thing! euughh ive only been using blender since november and there is still so much to learn. but still i am seriously thinking about maybe making it a side job if i build up a portfolio and get some clients ・゚・(。>ω<。)・゚・ i need to always be doing something creative, yknow?

work has been OK - literally we haven't had one single vistior since we've reopened. most days are pretty quiet but we've been fortunately doing okay and making lots of sales online... even tho i long for a better job im still just happy to have one thats seemingly stable u_U eeehh... we finally convinced one of our bosses to close for a week in august/september so im pretty excited. ;_; and im kind of thinking of "quitting" my second job, atleast physically..... but i have to think of how im going to do it. im perfectly fine with doing work remotely but the idea of going back to working 6 days a week with NO BREAKS EVER is making me depressed and tired just thinking about it. /vent. anyways me n the boyfriend have been watching jojo n we r on season 3 (josuke) and we're always sending each other jojo memes u_u every morning when i leave for work i put on the jojo op compilation, read the first comment and then laugh.

might i also mention......... i recently got some new guitar pedals - the bd-2 blues driver, a shoe-gazey overdrive pedal, and the totally ridiculous rainbow machine by earthquaker...which i guess is a pitch-shifting chorus pedal IF i had to describe it simply. but really it makes cool weird sci-fy noises and it was sort of expensive but i wanted to treat myself and get myself some cool toys.. anyways i got some daisy-chain thingies and extra cables so now i can connect all my pedals together and i havent tried it yet but ive been meaning to do so - so maybe ill get to it this weekend..


time: 1:58am
mood: eugh
eating: wine
listening: iii remember u (casper mcfadden)

long time no update o_o atleast it feels like it to mee... i don't have much to say this update, other than i just wanted to check in and post about some things. i'm back at work in nyc and getting tested bi-weekly for covid. got my results over the weekend and tested negative, BUUUUT it did take over two weeks to get my results. i went for another test on wednesday, so i don't except to receive them much faster.... i still think being physically in the office is pretty useless, but my bosses are two 80+ yr old women who won't retire...so.. i'm back even if they are in their second homes upstate ;_; might i mention... i am not paid enough for this kind of work, lol. i feel so conflicted because i feel lucky to have a full time job with benefits during a pandemic and economic recession, but it certainly doesn't pay enough...then i read articles about 15,000 art workers in nyc losing their jobs and 12,000 museums across the US closing, and i freak. THEN i think, working in something actually creative, is my true calling and maybe i can do 3d work freelance or full time...tis but a dream. needless to say, 3d exhibitions blew up so fast.

i'm still hesistant to fully launch my virtual gallery though because i truly want it to be more than a typical gallery, my dream is to go beyond the traditional art world and really create a new kind of space. but... there is much to think about. i have a "manifesto" in mind but really no time to ponder it. i can't help but think of how skewed the art world is in favor of the wealthy -- and believe me, i work in a mid-tier gallery, so i am right in the brunt of it ;_;

anyways...its rly late. i've been just working on making models and learning unity and programming etc etc and just gonna dump it all below. enjoy! ^_^

just started this model yesterday, it's a low-poly version of meee o_O body tbd... i gotta say the expressions, even if commical, turned out better than i thought and way better than when i tried to use the facebuilder add-on U_U

some more game WIPS.. but really, i'm still just learning the program, so idk how far this well ever go. either way it's still personally fufilling.

this is about showing off the sounds.. i made them in reaper and was trying to tie all the sounds together by a common thread :-) can you tell? i would love to comission musicians to make music for the game, but to be contineud..

helloooo and welcome to the room tour! ^o^ of course this is a work in progress and as i speak there are many a new furniture to be added.. !

well, thats it. tata for now!


time: 2:41am
mood: bzzz
eating: water
watching: karate kid

OMG! i have to laugh. fergus lawrie from urusei yatsura posted a link to their new music project on facebook and went to listen to the live show here.. and my edited pic of fergus ended up as the backdrop to one of the photos lmao. my influence :-P

my boyfriend and i have been watching jojo lately and we r halfway thru stardust crusaders.. n we like to play jump force w/ dio so in tribute i modeled a jojo cosplay for my characters :-) im making progress in unity.. so now npcs can follow you around ^_^

she was originally blue!

but then i thought the purple was a bit more fitting :-p

well!! there she is!!


time: 11:47pm
mood: content
eating: wine
watching: jojo bizzarre's adventures

✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧ _ e x p l o r e _ t h e _ d r e a m _ w o r l d _ ✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧

i mostly uploaded this demo so my boyfriend could try it out on his own, but my favorite part of skyrim is just exploring around and wanted to recreate that sense in my own "game" :-P programming is so over my head lol i need help.... but i was able to animate materials ! thanks to some code i found :-P

i got one of my freelancer checks in the mail yesterday, so i treated myself to another guitar pedal ^^; (with a discount..) im so excited to try it out. i got the rainbow machine by earth quaker ~ i want to use it with my omnichord >:-) or with my overdrive pedal ^_^. can't wait..


time: 12:38am
mood: sleepy af
eating: mojito
watching: beastars

today i played skyrim literally all day. i got up at like, 8am, stayed in bed for an hour, then just played skyrim on the xbox till maybe 10pm or so *_* my boyfriend got me into it and ive been playing for like 1-2 hrs at a time but i think im getting the hang of it and no longer freak out at enemies or in dungeons LOL.

well... not going to lie, it was nice to spend the whole day not on my phone or laptop. just a day for myself. i'm playing as a dark elf with a focus on sneak n magic ^-^ i only cheat a tiny bit because i didn't have the same experience w/ these kinds of games like my bf :-( i haated going into dungeons but now im getting used 2 the gameplay. i think my favorite part is just walking around and deviating from my original plan and discovering new things. =^^= anywhoo.. i'm so tired so imma go sleep. gnite!!


time: 10:45pm
mood: a lil sleepy...
eating: hard seltzer
watching: iceage live

eek! long time no update. my excuse is life is a lil depressing. anyways, i try not to be but i'm so self sabotaging out of habit! yelp. i want to get a new job desperately but my job search came right as a pandemic hit and the arts industry is always fucked the most.. only the elite survive - statistical fact! i have an insanely strange relationship with my professor in which i am her freelance employee but also long time colleague and occasional emotional laborer. i met her when i was 18 and a freshman in college and i impressed her so much she took me in as an intern that summer and ever since i've taken all her classes and have worked for her ever since.. the time has been both very rewarding and insanely soul crushing.. i have cried on the job before and not proud of it. i have such a hard time saying no. so i feel like im in limbo. i work for her and her wife, both prominent artists, on a freelance basis, and while i have respect for them both as artists, some times im so freakin stressed. anyways, this isn't even my full time job. before quarantine i was working part time on mondays on top of my full time, tues-sat job, so as u can imagine quarantine in nyc is a blessing to me... my full time gig is being a gallery assistant for a high end photography gallery.. and for the most part i like my job and my coworkers, but it is by no means a long term job. the pay is so low and it is so freakin stressfull at times... and it's such an entry level job that i wouldnt' grow career wise. the challange has been finding a suitable next job, however. i applied for an administrative job at SVA a few months ago and didnt hear back so :-p idk where to look.. i think i could make a good studio manager! hit me up.. plz.

when i'm not at work i find some time to work on ANYTHING creative.. it keeps me going - whether it's painting, 3d art, coding, or music.. i haven't painted at all since stuck at home until the past weekend. i miss it so much! eek. i feel like i have to play catch up.. but i don't think my time at home was wasted. i learned sooo much about 3d art and coding, which has been so fun. my true, secret, secret love is, however...music.. i've been playing guitar since i was 12-13 and always wanted to be in a serious band. so lately i've been playing more and regaining my calluses back and daydreaming about guitars and pedals and trying to convince my boyfriend to make a band with me >:-) but seriously.. if any gorls in nyc want to make a post-punk band email meeeeeeeeee.

p.s....another update at 11:53pm just to say.. i've been thinking about it and musicians have a special place in my h8rt and i can't explain it. maybe it's because everyone i've dated was a musician, or that kim gordon was right in her book when she said that artists are more logical and musicians are more emotional and therefore can't take criticism the same way.. i relate 2 that. im so much more open as an artist rather than a musician. im so embarrassed to death for anyone to hear my singing, and i don't even write lyrics for that matter.. my boyfriend was an aspiring musician and can sing so well..he hates to ever be sincere, but ive known him for so long and know he has an amazing voice :-( and sometimes i think music is my escape, not art.. idk.. i'd love to be swept away from the art world and join a band..


time: 11:05am
mood: nice ^^
eating: coffee
watching: contrapoints playing the sims

what a chill morning... it's my day off, i got to sleep in, it's quiet and it's a rainy spring morning. i'm having a nice cup of coffee and finishing the 3 hr contrapoints livestream i started last night and feeling nice from the delta8 i got recently.. i also got an email this morning which was making me a lil anxious but i didn't have to deal with it afterall so phew~ not that it's really a big deal, but freelancing for my "clients" just makes me really anxious, LOL. i think i have a hard time saying no..

yesterday after work i actually did some yoga! i also convinced my boyfriend to do it with me since we both wanted to work out more.. and i'm so happy he did it with me and wants to do it again! i used to do yoga a lot but stopped for a few years so i still sort of remembered most of the poses (we were listening to a yoga to the people podcast..they're donation based and i used to go to them in nyc) it helped me de-stress and my limbs are still feeling it the next day :-P

ok.. i'm going to go do some chores and relax. it's a three day weekend for me! woohoo.


time: 9:24pm
mood: hi
eating: n/a
listening: my bloody valentine

hey yall. since my last update i turned 26 years old and got my job back. :-P and i "soft launched" entrance or exit (check it out »HERE!!!« ).

if i'm being honest, i like being at home all the time and i don't mind it One Bit. i've been making ice cream - orange and vanilla, then orange again but with improved recipe and next i want to make earl grey !!!!! but fruity flavors are my favorite ice cream flavors...nothing tops cantelope coconut *_* i love my ice cream machine...its my baby.. my perfected orange ice cream recipe is this: 2 eggs, 3/4 c sugar, 1 c heavy cream, 2 c yogurt, and a heaping 1/3 c orange juice concentrate. yum!! it's not icey at all and deliciously tart and creamy.

oooh and yesterday i was daydreaming about guitars and i didn't think pink jazzmasters exist but i found one and its sooo beautiful. i want one soo bad :-( for years i've been using my brother's ephiphone sg but my dream guitar was always one with a whammy like the beautiful jazzmaster. i've been meaning to get myself the squier jazzmaster in sonic blue with the white pickguard but that seems to be sold out atm. and anyways the pink is just such a great colorway. i want to get it and put stickers on it!!!! i just bought a few online from mini super sticker club, shopkawaii, and eyeing THESE! which are especially cool.

anyways, i've been making more models in blender because it's fun to see my ocs in 3d *_* so here u go. dunno what i'll do with them.

i want to play more music..


time: 5:51pm
mood: relaxed
eating: dill pickle chips
watching: king krule live on the moon

woot! my cbd cartridge came in the mail today and it's my first time trying cbd... after months of no weed it's soo nice to have even cbd ;_; my first impression: the first hit i definitely felt something but it was like a nice relaxed feeling.. like a tiny buzz. i've taken a few hits since i got it and there isn't a high but just a nice relaxed feeling. (i got it from revel valley). im hoping it will help with anxiety and sleep. i was like on the verge of a panic attack last week :-( amid other health scares..o well. it's my birthday tomorrow so my insurance is running out soon and i'm still furloughed. i'm supposed to work part time starting next week once i get my work computer back (and probably don't qualify to get on my job's health plan now ack). i filed for unemployment and after almost two weeks of no phone call what-so-ever i finally called and got in touch with someone so i was finally able to start my weekly claims today it could always be worse. /complain

i came across on instagram this virtual gallery called gmo gallery! and wow it's so cool! i need to step my game up! it's so funny to see all these virtual exhibitions pop up (of course they would) and my virtual gallery is still forever in the works u_u haha but i'm getting there! it's all just me babey. maybe it's time to dust off my artist resources page and give it an overdue update and try to find more of these virtual galleries. ^^

ahhh im so happy that im finally reworking the gallery! it's making me want to re-do everything now re-do uffie's model, make some new logos, and maaaybe even redraw the pixel art on the website? :-? making the art for cinni's dream home inspired me but this is why nothing will ever be done LOL. one thing at a time..


time: 9:23pm
mood: :-3
eating: miller lite
watching: yt

wow thanks for all the new followers! i have been very absent from neocities lately so it's a nice suprise

i wanted to give the facebuilder add-on for blender another chance so i retook some reference photos and i think it came out so much better than my first attempt :-D see the before and after below...!



i think the main difference is my reference photos - this time around i took pictures specifically for facebuilder and retouched any loose hairs/jewelry/acne and then looked into making more realistic skin shaders. the first attempt i used photos with my bangs down so it's not as accurate. then of course, i had better luck with hair this second time around. it was giving me such trouble the first time i gave up LOL. i even made eyelashes and eyebrows! i used a free female body asset found online and edited to give it more natural/realistic proportions (and closer to my body) but it still feels off so idk what i'm going to do. the face is rigged too but i'm kind of limited with the facial expressions, since the eyelids are stuck in the neutral position and can't really blink or squinch up like this >:-/ i tried to recreate my profile pic but it didn't really work out lmao. at this point it's been like a few days straight of non-stop working on this model so it's a good time to put it on pause for now lmao.

i want to focus on my virtual gallery project next and hopefully open it up for submissions so i could make a virtual quarantine exhibition???!! but i think i need to brush up on unity and coding... i have a simple camera-following-character and character movement script so honestly thats all i need but it would be nice to add some extra features to have like a pop-up menu for artist info and junk.. to be continued. on my to-do list is to design the actual space and build it and maybe refine the website more. i think it would be nice upon launch to make a lil pdf of the exhibition or even do a mailing! i still want to refine the look of the 3d space too. i think flat-shading will be the best for now as it's much more forgiving and my computer can handle it without unity crashing. i did attempt some hdrp shaders in unity but learning unity's nodes is like learning blender nodes all over again and it's hard to get the shading to look RIGHT sooo.. i think this looks cool given the limitations.

ta ta for now,

time: 9:35pm
mood: :-(
eating: screwdriver
watching: n/a

wowie a whole month as gone by and no update. ive been working from home the last month and then all my free time was 100% dedicated to gaiaonline and then working on blender and unity LOL. i stay up every night until 3am working on my projects then get up at 9:50am to start work at 10am. but unfourtunately i've been furloughed today. im not suprised at all but the news still sucks. i worked at an art gallery and sales are like (crickets). ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!

in other news i made another model and i've improved alot since my first 3d model back in november !! but i spent like 2 days working on the walk cycle (and figuring out chain physics, which i gave up on and animated the chain by hand) and then accidently deleted it !!!! ;_; i didn't realize until i imported the model into unity and was wondering why i was only getting her idle animation...me cries.. before i do it all over again though, im taking a break and watching more unity tutorials b/c i put in many hours into learning blender but barely any into unity ~ and the shading doesn't transfer over so it's like learning blender all over again .-. i leave you with this walk cycle gif that remains.


time: 10:43pm
mood: *eeeks*
eating: perogies
watching: kat blaque live stream

island isolation

week one of quarantine update...i dont go out anyways, so things feel the same in that regard haha. not gonna lie though im already an anxious person so theres a looming sense of doom i've been trying to avoid... thinkin about the health of my (vulnerable) boyfriend and loved ones, finances, etc... a few days ago i was on facetime with my friend whose in ireland atm and *TMI!!!* mid-way i went to the loo and i was spotting :-( which never happened b4. then i was feeling super light headed and had to lay down. so i was kind of freaked in the moment. i feel ok now though, so i think it was just underlying stress ⋋( •́ ∧ •̀ ˵)⋌

so i work a full time job + part time job 6 days a week (and freelance remotely) and im lucky that i'm able to continue working at home and still get paid. and working at home is 100000% better than going into work. but marx was right y'all lol. (\* ̄o ̄*)> sigh. i feel like i need to make any free time worth it and then feel so bad when i "ruin" it. but then i try to remember that this is only week one and who knows what the future will hold so maybe just work as much as i can. i hope everyone is finding things to do to ease their minds and maybe have time for a hobby or two.

actually, while working at home i've been able to work on my 3d projects :-D i finally made some walk/idle animations for my models AND ive been following unity tutorials on making basic rpg-games so i wanted to test it out with: ISLAND ISOLATION! it's up now on my "virtual-project space" entranceorexit.net (cool name for it, huh).

take care evewybody. xoxo,

time: 12:29am
mood: zzz
eating: n/a
watching: n/a

i made some pixels today! *dump*


time: 1:43am
mood: U_U SLEEPY!
eating: n/a
watching: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iWQMt-LXTI8

i have lots of ideas for this website..! i want to add a dolls/pixel/adopt section, or even a dolls maker / room maker or revive some cliques.. i've been surfing old pixel sites on the web archive and it's bringing back memories, LOL. i stumbled upon bubbleshoes.net/teenie_co/ and totally forgot about it but it brought back a lot of memories from when i was a kid. funny seeing all those sites half-empty, because i could vaguely remember surfing them when they were active. ~_~ also on my to-do list is make some custom graphics for cinni's dream home, which who knows when i'll get to it. it took me forever to draw the layout for entranceorexit.net. anyways, i've been working on this doll base and hope to have something fun to share soon. ~


time: 1:04am
mood: :-X
eating: n/a
watching: n/a

i think i want to work on these dolls more but just gonna post this for tonight...~

i made the apple strawberry ice cream tonight and it turned out so good! :-99. up l8 again...oops!!


time: 12:47m
mood: zzz
eating: water

another doll for the night.. ~

today i made apple jelly.. and it came out so good! i'm so happy! tomorrow i'm making strawberry & apple ice cream and i needed some apple jelly so i figured i could make some :-9

i'm up late as always... good night!


time: 1:18am
mood: :^)
eating: too much cheese
watching: Pastry Chef Attempts to Make Gourmet Doritos

lemme quickly dump these dolls i made tonight before i go to bed >:3c i've been meaning to make more... the base is the cherry base from pinkland. it's meee

ta ta for now,

time: 9:21pm
mood: le tired
eating: water
watching: n/a

happy valentines day!

do you remember the quilting bee? i fondly remember this site from years ago when i was a kid. i probably spent so many hours going down a rabbit hole of outlinks. i always wanted to participate in the quilting bee but i was too young really to have my own website. im pretty sure i had a watermelon-pixel themed freewebs site (with a splash page that opened up a tiny fixed-size window..that style was all the rage for cute pixel sites. if you know you know) but i cant for the life of me remember what alias i went by or find it via the internet archive... i used so many different throw away emails before sticking with a consistent aim email address in 2006! (which is still in use for some logins, lol )

i will try my best to remember other websites i loved visiting, but so many just fall out of memory and sadly aren't archived...


time: 10:17pm
mood: @->--
eating: smoked cheese
watching: 2 minute papers

looooooooooong time no update. im still alive!! i haven't had much time nor energy to work on this site (life happened). i'm still progressing in blender and learning unity! tiny gif dump below vvvv

i think the look of 3d objects turned to lo-res gifs is very cute and nostalgic. i want to make more for ppl 2 adopt. ALSO!! a demo of my virtual gallery, entrance or exit, is now live »HERE« i still like the pixel version and the 3d version, so ill probably keep both... webGL isn't mobile friendly and i would like it to be accessible.

i have a headache so im going to keep this entry short... ta ta for now!!